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In need of feedback or advice
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TOPIC: In need of feedback or advice
#77397
*~*Missy*~*
Taiyoukai
Posts: 478
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In need of feedback or advice 12 Years, 7 Months ago Karma: 20
I have been writing a new story and am finding it a little hard to write but i would like to get some feedback and see what you all think about the story and things that need fixing or things you would like to see. I hope you enjoy the fic and thanks

dokuga.com/fanfiction/story/7013/1

ADMINISTRATIVE EDIT: Rated MA
 
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Last Edit: 2012/04/03 01:48 By MoxyMikki.
 
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#77402
KEdakumi
Daiyoukai
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Re:In need of feedback or advice 12 Years, 7 Months ago Karma: 56
I'm really enjoying your story. Sesshoumaru seems a bit OOC, but not too bad. Personally, I see Kagome trying to avoid any closeness from anyone for awhile... abuse could cause that. She'd have to learn how to have a normal relationship.

Love to see Inu get his 'just' rewards, but not for awhile. He's gotta do the whole thing where he doesn't really see what he's done wrong and there's no real proof, aside from cheating, that he's done anything more then argue.

I'm looking forward to your next chapter and can't wait to see where you take this.
 
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#77494
Kyndred Raven
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Re:In need of feedback or advice 12 Years, 7 Months ago Karma: 22
I really like the plot you've got going in this story. You've got a good, strong, writing voice. Eventually, it will get stronger the more that you write.

There are a few grammar mistakes that I noticed, but nobody is perfect. Sometimes writers even make grammar errors on purpose. If you're worried about this, then are always betas. They help a LOT (just discovered that recently myself).

Overall, I like your style very much. I'm definitely going to be following this to see where it goes ^_^
 
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