Say What? by Imanewme

Say What?

Title: Say What?

Author: Imanewme

Genre: Nonsense

Word count: 1,254

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: Someone's probably OOC

AU/Canon: AU

Theme: Love Hurts

Written for Inucomedyclub

Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha. I just like to play with the characters.

Sesshoumaru quirked his eyebrow from behind the morning paper. He appeared to be immersed in the morning news, but in fact his ears were trained on Kagome's telephone conversation. Their anniversary was fast approaching. He knew she was planning something and his curiosity was getting the better of him.

She always tried to surprise him on their anniversary, and he always found out and ruined the surprise. It had become tradition, and this year was no different. She would make some plans for an exciting night out that would end as a steamy affair. She relished in making their love life exciting, and Sesshoumaru loved her for it.

He could not believe how careless Kagome was being this year. He thought she understood about his sensitive hearing, but apparently over time she had forgotten, because she was openly discussing her surprise anniversary plans with Sango on the phone that morning.

"Oh Sango, I know what my man likes," Kagome told her friend. "I know how to please my man. In fact, he's going to go crazy when he sees the plan. That man is inspired very easily. Don't let that stoic expression fool you."

Sesshoumaru smirked at this remark.

" I don't think he'll mind it if you and Miroku join us. The more the merrier, after all."

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened in surprise. Apparently there was a side to his sweet Kagome he hadn't seen. He entertained visions of conquest over the two women while Miroku looked on. Sango wasn't the traditional beauty, but she was cute. A flush of arousal washed over Sesshoumaru as he considered Sango's lithe and strong body. It would be worth suffering through having Miroku present to taste that forbidden fruit. If he were lucky, Kagome would appreciate Sango, too. Crossing his leg and re-arranging the paper, he tried to hide his growing erection should Kagome come into the room that moment.

"Oh yes, Sango, he's going to love it!" Kagome gushed. "I just know he's going to be surprised, too. Do you think he'll ever guess what we're planning?"

"Yes, Miko, this Sesshoumaru will love it! This Sesshoumaru knows well enough what you're planning." Sesshoumaru thought. His mouth watered as he entertained further fantasies of the two women mewling their pleasure under his touch.

"Oh I bought the appropriate attire and even a few tools!" Kagome squealed.

"Tools?" Sesshoumaru's face remained expressionless as he considered that prospect. They had never used "tools" in the bedroom before. "This could be interesting."

"Oh that's a great idea!" Kagome squealed, "I never thought of using twine."

Sesshoumaru shifted again and tried to will his erection away before he stormed into their bedroom and took Kagome then and there. "If I had known she was open to the idea of bondage, this Sesshoumaru would have tried it years ago."

"Of course he has the proper clothes. If he shows up in something inappropriate, he can always change. It's not like we'll be out in public."

"So this event's going to happen here," Sesshoumaru thought with mild surprise. Kagome usually made her "surprise" anniversary plans away from home. "Very clever, Kagome," he thought, "mixing it up a bit." His eyes narrowed as he considered what he would wear. A shopping trip was in order, and he would be sure to spare no expense for this outing.

"So tomorrow at 9 a.m. then? Don't forget to bring your tools, too!" Kagome said brightly and hung up the phone.

Kagome skipped around the corner and gasped. "So you overheard," she said with a hint of dejection. "Well, I guess it can't be helped," she said with a sigh, "You figure it out every year anyway. Just be sure you dress appropriately tomorrow morning, okay?"

Sesshoumaru simply nodded, relieved that Kagome had not noticed his very aroused state. Tonight he was going to go out and buy some "attire" just for the occasion. After all, if Miroku was coming, Sesshoumaru needed to be sure he was dressed kinkier than the pervert. He was not going to be outdone.

That night Sesshoumaru went to the mall. As much as he hated the mall, he loved pleasing Kagome in the bedroom more. After wandering around for about an hour, he finally found what he was looking for. He hastily chose some boots, spurs, chaps and a leather vest. On his way to the checkout he spotted a riding crop. Fleeting visions of spanking Miroku with the odd shaped whip raced across his mind. "I could get used to THAT idea," he thought and snatched it off the shelf. The sooner he got out of the mall the better.

Sesshoumaru barely slept for the anticipation. The "event" would be in the morning, and he couldn't wait to see this hidden S&M side to the sweet woman at his side. Morning finally arrived, and Sesshoumaru merely acted surprised when Kagome sent him out on an errand.

"Clearly she wants this Sesshoumaru to be out for awhile," Sesshoumaru thought looking at his list. "Manure, tomato posts, twine," Sesshoumaru smirked as he read that item on the list, "hand trowel, gloves, a hoe, and a garden hose. Hn. My Kagome is going to do some gardening this summer," he thought.

His thoughts turned to confusion when he recalled what Kagome said that morning while handing him the list. "We'll need all of this for today's fun," she had said. Looking at the list again, Sesshoumaru inwardly shuddered. Kagome was taking the S&M thing a bit further than he had expected. Strange visions of smearing manure over Miroku and spanking him with his crop brought the smile back to his face. No matter how perverted and kinky this got, Sesshoumaru was willing to please his mate.

Kagome met him at the door when he returned. "Put that stuff on the back porch and change quickly," she told her mate, "Miroku and Sango are on the way." Looking down at herself Kagome frowned. "I suppose I should change, too, but you first" she said, shoving him through the bedroom door and pulling it shut behind him. "Please don't take too long!" She called through the closed door.

In a flash Sesshoumaru was in his new outfit. Leather chaps over worn jeans, the boots, the spurs, the leather jacket without the shirt. Picking up the crop he smirked and left the bedroom. The house was too quiet. Scenting the air he quickly realized that Miroku, Sango, and Kagome were in the back yard.

Tossing his hair and smirking, Sesshoumaru went outside.

"Surpris..." The cheer fell short as the group took in Sesshoumaru's appearance.

Looking from one person to the next, Sesshoumaru felt his anger rising. Miroku was dressed in some faded jeans and a t-shirt. Kagome had on some old over-alls and was sporting a bandana around her long black hair. Sango also had on jeans and her hair was pulled up into a ponytail. All had on gardening gloves and a gas tiller stood a few steps behind them.

Suddenly Kagome burst out laughing, "We're planting a garden for our anniversary Sesshoumaru. What did you think we were doing?"

Sesshoumaru lifted a surprised Kagome into his arms suddenly and smirked. "Maybe Sango and Miroku are planting a garden," he said, "but this Sesshoumaru will be planting his seed." Looking to Sango and Miroku he smirked again, "I expect to see you two done by lunch," he said and carried Kagome inside. This would be one anniversary he would make sure Kagome did not forget.