Bird in a Cage by thetroll

Chapter 1

A/N: Trigger Warning - this story features a Dark!InuYasha and deals with domestic violence and assault. 

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Kagome leaned up against a tree, cuddling the tiny nekomatta in her lap. While the kitten looked like Kirara, she had no relation to Sango's firecat. Instead, Hana—the name Kagome had given the kitten when she'd found it—had been alone and on her own when Kagome had quite literally stumbled upon her just the day before.

"I hope you aren't too cold," she murmured to Hana as the kitten mewled. Hana was a third of the size of Kirara and Kagome suspected that Hana was only a few months old—if that—given her size.

She eyed the blaze before them dubiously. The fire was the only warmth they had to ward off the brisk autumn air. Kagome had no home to take Hana back to, but even knowing her own situation, she couldn't turn away someone who needed her.

"If I hadn't started that last fight," she told the purring kitten in her lap, "we would both have a place to sleep tonight."

But then, she thought to herself gloomily, if I hadn't started that last fight, I still would have felt trapped. He still would have been controlling everything I did, form how I dressed to what I did. 

She had become a stand-in for Kikyo, and any time she had done something out of character for Kikyo, InuYasha had made sure Kagome had paid for it.

It had started small enough, with a simple enough request. He'd wanted her to grow out her hair. He'd liked it long and he'd thought it was sexy when she pulled it back in the traditional miko hairstyle. He'd been so tender back then, so gentle, and she had enjoyed knowing that she'd aroused him with something so simple.

But then it had evolved to him controlling the most minute details. How she talked, how she walked, even how she carried out her own priestess duties. And any time she'd failed to live up to his expectations, he would become cruel, emotionally and verbally berating her until she'd finally lost the will to even eat.

This wasn't the life I came back from my era for.

Hana's tiny whine snapped Kagome out of her thoughts and she glanced down at the kitten in her lap. The kitten shivered and she pulled Hana closer to her body heat.

Sango had been the first one to notice and it had been Sango who had smuggled her out of the village with Kirara when InuYasha and Miroku had been away slaying a troublesome minor yokai in another village with Kohaku, who had come for a visit. Sango had entrusted her sleeping children to Rin and Kaede snuck Kagome out of the village. Sango been the one to fill Kagome's backpack she'd inadvertently left behind when she'd destroyed the jewel with all the basic supplies she'd need to make a life for herself somewhere else.

But Sango hadn't acted alone. The ofudas from Miroku and the dried herbs she'd prepared with Rin for Kaede told her that. Her friends—no, she decided, her family—had done everything they could to ensure she would be safe and looked after, even if they couldn't be with her.

And yet she'd only been able to say goodbye to Sango. It would have been too risky otherwise.

The lack of goodbyes still haunted her, as had Sango's final warning.

"You can't come back here," Sango had said as they stood at the edge of the village together. "He's going to look for you as soon as he realizes you're gone, Kagome. It's in his nature. He may be a hanyo, but he's an inuhanyo. He's marked you as his. And if he finds you, he's going to convince you to go back." 

"I don't want to leave you, Sango. Or Miroku. I want to see your kids grow up. I want to see them get married and have kids of their own, too." Kagome had sniffed back tears. Her emotions were absolute mess. She had the desire to stay with her friends despite all she'd been through and a fear of the unknown for being on her own. At the same time, she was so afraid of what would happen if she didn't leave and stay with InuYasha.

Sango's eyes were just as full of tears as Kagome's but the slayer didn't bother wiping them away. "We want you to be happy, Kagome. That means more to us than anything else. If you're happy, we will be, too. But I can't see you suffer one more day, Kagome. If you don't go, I might end up killing InuYasha for you."

Kagome wiped at the tears streaming down her face at the memory. She could still feel Sango's strong embrace before the slayer had actually picked up her friend, and, still crying, put Kagome on the back of Sango.

I miss them all. She tucked Hana into the lapel of her kimono, wanting to both warm the kitten and feel Hana's purring body against her own. Being on my own is so hard.

"I need to find shelter soon," she murmured to herself, staring up at the night sky through the trees. "Winter's coming and neither of us are built for the snow, Hana."

Hana mewled sleepily into Kagome's abdomen and flexed her claws against Kagome's skin in a kneading movement that was as reassuring as it was prickly.

Kagome sighed but settled back against the tree, taking a quick glance to ensure that Miroku's ofudas were still up where she'd put them. They wouldn't ward off human attackers, but it was the best she could do with what she had. Hopefully, Hana would hear any humans and wake Kagome up before they reached her.

She closed her eyes and waited for sleep to come to her. Until it did, she kept replaying memories of her friends to try and keep the loneliness at bay.

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Kagome woke at as the sun began to rise into the sky. She hadn't intentionally dozed off facing east but she was glad for the happy accident because it kept her from oversleeping.

Gingerly, she rose to her feet, shivering as she realized her fire had burnt itself out at some point. Though there wasn't yet snow on the ground, the air was cold enough for it. She wrapped her blanket around herself, turning it into a mock shawl, though she was careful to keep from dislodging Hana as the kitten slumbered against her chest.

She pulled her backpack straps over her shoulders and set out, grateful once again that Kirara had dumped Kagome in a totally random place. Flying meant she'd left no scent behind for InuYasha to trace and the lack of familiar surroundings meant that Kirara had succeeded in ensuring Kagome wouldn't be easily found.

"But where are we?" she wondered to herself aloud. She was sure that, sooner or later, she would find a human village to refresh her supplies. If she was lucky, they wouldn't have a miko already in residence and would be willing to put her up for the winter.

It would have been more helpful, however, if she'd paid more attention to what direction Kirara had taken her just days before. Kagome had first been lost to her tears and then to a depression that had rendered her incapable of caring. It was only hearing Hana's mewls not long after Kirara had left Kagome that had awakened some sense of care and purpose within her.

She sighed as she picked a direction at random and set off, wandering through the forest until she reached the end. The land transformed into a flat, grassy terrain, but there was a wildness to it that told her it hadn't seen a human hand in some time. 

Looks like it's going to be awhile yet until I find a village. She sighed quietly as she plodded along, checking periodically to make sure that Hana was still safely tucked into Kagome's kimono.

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Two more days passed before Kagome found a village, but it was one that she hadn't lingered in long. They'd had a recent yokai attack and were too on edge to even consider living with a nekomatta, even if it was a tiny kitten accompanied by a miko. Kagome had stayed just long enough to refill her bag of rice before continuing on her way—but she'd taken a moment to silently thanked Sango for slipping a small bag of coins into her backpack that allowed her to resupply without worrying about payment.

Those coins were probably Sango's and Miroku's entire savings and though Sango had made Kagome promise not to go back, she was determined to one day find a way to pay her friends back for their kindness.

For now, her options were growing dimmer. The day after she'd left the village, she woke to a sudden temperature drop that told her a snowstorm was imminent. Hana had managed to move in the middle of the night, tucking her shivering body between Kagome's thighs in a last ditch attempt to find warmth to stave off the cold air.

I wonder if I could find a cave before the snowstorm hits, she mused to herself, looking at the nearby mountain. It's too late to turn back to the village now to wait the storm out, even if that was still an option. And I doubt I'd be lucky enough to find an abandoned hut or a temple, either.

She shifted Hana back to her abdomen, taking a moment to pull out her spare kimono to wrap the nekomatta in for extra warmth before she tucked Hana back into the little pocket of fabric in her kimono that had become Hana's temporary bedding. Hana shivered less violently, but it didn't alleviate Kagome's worries any.

"I have to find shelter," she murmured to herself. "If not for me, then for Hana. She can't take much more of this."

Kagome finished breaking camp, tucking the ofudas back into her bag before she set back out, aiming straight for the mountain. There had to be a cave in there somewhere and as long as they had food and fire, they would probably be okay to wait it out.

With that in mind, she began collecting twigs and branches as she walked, as well as several handfuls of dried leaves, throwing them haphazardly into her  open backpack on her shoulders as she went. She didn't know how long the storm would last or how deep the snow would get, so she didn't stop collecting until she couldn't fit any more into her backpack or carry any more in her arms without overly fatiguing herself. 

Yet she couldn't shake off the fear that it wasn't going to be enough to see them both through the storm.

"If I find a cave in enough time, I can always go find more timber," she reminded herself but it didn't help her anxiety any. She couldn't shake off the feeling that this storm was going to be worse than any other she'd experienced since she came to the feudal era.

But she began searching for a cave in earnest, hoping against hope that she could find one in time. As she began skirting the foothills, the climate dropped further, accompanied by a cold breeze that started off.

The cave she finally found was nothing remarkable, but it was deep enough that Kagome could get back out of the wind. She set her backpack down and immediately went to work setting up a campfire, but she already felt a little warmer.

Once the fire was roaring and properly banked, she turned back to the mouth of the cave and gasped as she saw the snow falling outside. It was falling fast enough that she didn't dare risk going outside again. If she fell or got hurt, there was no one around to help her.

Her eyes began watering as she was abruptly reminded of the fact that she was alone—and why. Her hand absently moved to cover the healing bruise on her shoulder where he'd grabbed her that night when she'd tried to leave their hut to spend the night with Sango to give them both space to cool off.

"You're not goin'," InuYasha had growled when she'd stood to leave. 

"We're not going to fix this tonight, InuYasha," she'd said, striving to be reasonable despite her own irritation. "I'm just going to spend the night with Sango. I'll be back in the morning and we can talk about this more then."

"Hell no." InuYasha was instantly on his feet. "She always puts dumb ideas into your head. Kikyo always talked with me about what was wrong."

She flinched.

Something welled up within Kagome then. A desire to hurt him as his words had hurt her. "Except for when she shot you with an arrow!" she snapped, regretting the words as soon as they left her lips.

InuYasha's upper lip curled, exposing his fangs. "You got no right talking 'bout her like that. She never woulda let our house get to such a state because of her priestess duties. Kikyo wanted to be a real woman but you don't even care about being a wife."

She'd heard the comparison before but it still stung. "I do love you, InuYasha, but I can't turn away people who need my help," she said, exhausted at repeating the same argument once again as she reached for the curtain that acted as their door. "Kaede's eyesight has been going for awhile now and she can't really help out anymore. She needs my help—"

InuYasha's hand reached out to grab her by the shoulder. His grip was biting as he pulled her back into the hut. "I said," he growled, "you ain't going anywhere."

Kagome pushed back the memories, not wanting to remember what had happened next. He had been possessive, turning their normal bondage play into something far darker.

The bruise had been the signal for Sango to act, though it had been the only visible mark he'd left on her.

Hana reached out and bumped her head into Kagome's bosom as she chirped.

"I forgot to feed you, huh?" Kagome's grimace fell into a small smile as she moved to get the dried fish she'd prepared for Hana the night before. "Here you are, Hana."

She ate the last of her own rice cake, setting aside her raw rice to prepare tomorrow. She pulled Hana back into her embrace, draping the kimono and her blanket over them. If she was lucky, the storm would clear up in the morning and would have melted by the time she set out.

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Sesshomaru felt the shifting winds and sensed the changing weather. The first snow.

He turned on his heel to look for a place to wait out the storm. He saw no reason to be uncomfortable when shelter would be readily available, though he was grateful Jaken had been summoned by his mother and had taken Ah-Un with him. He had no desire to listen to Jaken's endless whining. 

The mountain. He would find a suitable cave there.

He made his way towards the mountain, searching as he flew overhead for a cave that would be large enough for his true form. If the temperature dropped too much, he would be better be able to conserve heat in his true form.

The first few caves he found were too small for his needs, but as the snow began to pile up on the ground, he found a cave more suitable for his needs. It still wasn't as large as he would have preferred for comfort, but it would have to do.

He landed at the mouth of the cave and started as he caught a familiar scent. Kagome, he thought in recognition, and then quickly correct himself, InuYasha's woman.

But he scented only the faintest trace of InuYasha's presence. Her human companions weren't with her, either. In fact, all he sensed was the woman herself and the unfamiliar scent of a nekomatta.

His lips thinned as he considered the ramifications. Either something had happened to InuYasha, or he had deliberately cast aside honor and abandoned his wife.

Either way, Sesshomaru could not leave the priestess alone, especially not when he could scent the healing injuries upon her flesh. 

He stepped into the cave, surprised to see the priestess had fallen asleep by a fire, curled up in her own clothing. It was the backpack by her side that drew his attention and he pondered for himself what it could mean. 

He flared his yoki, allowing a measure of protection since she hadn't done it herself, before he approached her. As he walked into the cave, her face turned to him as if she'd sensed his presence in her sleep, though she didn't awaken.

The nekomatta curled up against her did, however. It woke up to look at him and he had the suspicion it was evaluating him.

After a moment, it turned away and settled back against the priestess. 

The priestess shivered suddenly, trying unsuccessfully to wrap more of her blanket around her. He spotted her pack beside her and was reminded of their past encounters. She had often produced supplies from the bag, he recalled, and though he also remembered that she was possessive of the bag and its contents, he had no desire to see her suffer unnecessarily from the elements, either.

But when he cautiously checked inside the yellow pack, he saw no additional clothing or blankets, nor did she have any other supplies to help her withstand the cold.

A mental picture of what might have happened was forming in his mind and he pressed his lips together to stop the growl that threatened to escape. 

She shifted again in her sleep, turning towards him, and the movement allowed her loose lapel to slip further, exposing her bare shoulder and the deep purplish blue bruise of a handprint that mottled her fair skin.

It carried with it the faint scent of InuYasha.

Careful of his claws, he settled the lapel more firmly over her before it exposed any more of her skin. If she had any other marks on her, he wasn't sure how he would handle it.

With a quiet sigh of resignation, he settled down beside her, unfurling the fluff of his tail to settle it around her in the hopes of warming her. If he had been more certain of her reaction, he would have transformed into his true form and curled around her, but given the trauma she had already endured, he was reluctant to cause any additional pain.

Yet he knew where the fault lay. InuYasha might have been the one to harm his own wife, but Sesshomaru had inadvertently allowed it to happen. He had believed her to be happy to InuYasha and had not wished to burden her with his own feelings when she'd made her choice clear from the beginning.

So he had never spoken of his own feelings and had sought to distance himself from her. In doing so, he had missed the signs of the pain she'd endured.

"This one apologizes, Kagome," he rumbled, watching as she tried unsuccessfully to brush hair out of her face. She grumbled in her sleep as she tried and failed again.

Unbidden, his hand moved of its own accord to brush the hair from her face. "Rest," he murmured to her, reluctantly pulling his hand back before he trampled over any of her other human boundaries. "This one promises you, Kagome, that he will not allow any pain to befall you again."

He would ask nothing of her, pressure her to do nothing. It would be her choice what she wanted from him aside from his protection, for that was the one thing she would have regardless of her own feelings.

InuYasha would not be allowed to harm her again.