Hi Princess_Akitomi, you have the makings of a great story here. I have somethings to say about it though, please don't take it as bashing or picking or flaming, I don't do those things. I just want to help out a little. I read your story twice eariler today and now. I think you need to slow down and think your story through, I mean speed write your ideas out as they come but think about them as you re-write. Your story has holes and places where things don't make sence. Like for one, did Kouga know that Kagome was going to break up with him? Why would he try to rape her in an alley with her kit as a witness, when he could have at their place? Also, in chap 2, Inuyashia knew what he was planning to do, according to the way Inuyashia put it; seems Kouga would first try to seduce her and if that didn't work attack, since he was trying to get into her pants as Yashia explained. Which is a good way to incorporate him into the story and having the two as best friends is an excellent idea, think of all the trouble they could get into. Also, it was written that Shippou ran before Kouga began to rip at her clothes, but he told Sessy that's what Kouga was doing, he didn't see that he had ran away and being young he would barly have an understanding of what was happening. Akitomi, Kouga's younger brother, he should have been upset to learn that his older brother was capable to attempeted to rape someone. Most of all why would Kaogme take Kouga to Sessy's office to break up with him and take her Kit to witness it? I don't want you to stop writing at all, this is truly the makings of an awesome story, but I think for your first fic you have to many characters on the scene at once and your moving a little to fast. Your story doesn't flow and it's becoming a little to crowed at once. Please, please don't take this as a flame or any other negative remark. I don't post stories and I have no right to flame people who do or critize harshly, I really believe you have potential alot of it and so does this story. Please keep writing and just slow down and ask your characters questions, and something I told my daughter when I was teaching her to write, don't assume you readers know things, we don't until your characters tells us. Calm down with the amount of characters in your story at once. This will be a very good story, I can't wait to read more. Let me know if I can help. I can't wait for your update. Write on! Much Love InuAngel