I like your story, but the fomt is a little hard to read. do you think you could use black?

It seems like you are rushing the story. I think it whould improve a lot if you slow down and put more details in.

Your story is good but it's somewhat hard to read since the words are in gray and not black.

I see a lot of younger writers doing the little skits before and after a chapter and I don't understand why they do it because most really aren't good. It adds unnecessary word fluff to a story. AN's I get - skits I don't. What that said, I'm not going to tell you your story was good because I honestly don't know. The errors were too numerous to see the story. You had grammatical errors throughout the story, the gray scale made it difficult to read, wording errors like "bag’s" for "bags" "fine" instead of "find" "your" instead of "you're" and by the time I got to the end where you included AN's in the story, I gave up. You seriously referred to Mokomoko-sama as a boa? You should consider a beta or rewrite your story and also try not to put (growls louder)-like wording in your story.

I really like where this story seems to be heading. Although it certainly needs some cleaning up, and the grey font does make things difficult. If you like, I can beta your work for you. It's something I'm generally pretty good at. Message me if you choose to accept my offer.

Wow, Kagome was really about to kick some ass. Yea Kagome, it's about time. This is going to be a very interesting story. Keep it up.