One thing seriously jumps out at me about any of your fics that I've attempted to read. You rush things. I understand. I find myself trying to rush through the little stuff to get to some action, but at the same time, if you don't give a little bit of foundation to a story, it just doesn't flow right. Slow things down a bit. When you finish a chapter, go back a read through it; add little things like a description of scenery, a little bit of back story. Unless you plan to expand on the reasons why, don't have Sessho just jumping in and demanding Kags to be his mate. Unlike Kagome/Kouga or Kagome/Inuyasha, this is a tricky pairing, because of Sesshomaru's hatred for humans. You have to show the reader why he changed his mind about mating one.
So, please take in mind what I've said and try to slow things down a bit. It could make a great plotline expand into an epic story.
Sayonara
tragic_priestess
